I Lost My Ass in Connecticut

ESL - January, 2008



Everyone knows that Tony Bennett has left his heart in San Francisco
Almost the same thing has happened to me: 
I have lost my ass in Connecticut - details to follow -
Every time I drive north on I-95 (to the casino,) I pass by this town named Mianus - and the poet in me goes MIANUS Ė URANUS thereís gotta be a song in that. Well there is, and this is it: 



I step into my vehicle, I make the front of it point north,
Iím gonna hit that Indian casino, and multiply my monetary worth
I drive up that New England throughway
My pocketís full and my hopes are high,
Iím gonna crush all opposition Iíll be the Catcher in the Rye.
Just a couple of miles past Greenwich Ė a sign from up above,
Looks like any other road sign and it says Mianus Ĺ a mile
Somebody tell me
If Mianusís in Connecticut 
and Uranusís spinning round the sun,
Who amongst us, is having more fun?
I laugh at it and say: I donít believe all that I see,
No matter where Iím going, my anus goes with me!
So Iíve been to the Mohegans Iíve placed many a bet,
I donít feel very cheery, donít wanna talk anymore Ďbout that!
My bank accounts are sobbing, my creditís ripped to shreds,
Donít know how Iíll raise the rent, gotta live on leftover dregs.
I drive by that frightful green omen, my head it ainít so high
If Mianus is in Connecticut, now I know the reason why.
Copyright © 2008 Ernest Samuel Llime. All Rights Reserved